A university lecturer asked her students describe in a page or less the difference between ignorance and apathy. She was forced to give an A+ to the student who wrote: "I don't know and I don't care."
An elephant from a nearby circus was drinking water from the Murray River when he noticed a turtle asleep on a log.
He walked over, took aim and kicked the turtle clear across the river.
A passing wombat asked, "What did you do that for?"
The elephant replied, "Because I recognised it as the same turtle that took a nip out of my trunk 53 years ago."
"What a memory", said the wombat.
"Yes", replied the elephant, "Turtle recall!"
Q. What do you call a blind dinosaur?
A. Do you think he saw us?
Q. What doe you get when you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?
A. Big Holes all over Australia!
"It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens!" (W. Allen)